Boundaries: Finding a Balance of Power

By Dana Borowka, MA, Ellen Borowka, MA and Nancy Croix

[dropcaps type=”circle” color=”” background=””]B[/dropcaps]oundaries have an important place in our relationships, our family, the work place, and all aspects of daily life. When there is confusion over boundaries, we tend to run into many issues that need to be dealt with.scale

What are boundaries?

The dictionary defines boundaries as, “Something that marks or fixes a limit (as of territory)”. In essence, boundaries help us to determine where ‘I’ end and ‘you’ begin. Where are my limits? What are my needs? What are the rules or guidelines for our relationship? Some may resist the idea of guidelines… claiming that they are too rigid or stifling. Leading us to another question, why should we have boundaries?

Lack of boundaries tends to create much uncertainty and misunderstandings that can lead to chaos, anger and pain. Without boundaries, people can feel taken advantage of or invalidated or not heard by the other person. A lack of respect can grow in the relationship, and then feelings of hurt, resentment and anger can develop and fester beneath the surface. Yet, what are we really searching for? Bottom line: a relationship that is NOT based on respect and empathy is a hollow relationship. One that is without substance, depth or true love. I think we search for a place; a relationship to trust that we know will be safe, supportive and lasting. Boundaries ensure that.

What do we need for boundaries?

• Communication – Boundaries that are well communicated can set the tone for a healthy environment where everyone clearly knows where they stand. This enhances honesty, trust, and an atmosphere where issues can be worked through. Guidelines need to be negotiated and clearly communicated so everyone involved knows what is expected of them. What are the requests and concerns? What’s ok and what’s not? It’s also important to define for yourself what is acceptable or not acceptable from others. Is there a relationship or situation that you are tolerating, yet underneath you feel pain, anger, disrespect? Then you may have not defined for yourself where the limits are. What is the cutoff point? If you don’t communicate your boundaries, then you are staying in a situation that is not healthy.

We always have our options open when we communicate what we want or need. A friend told about me about a simple example. She had some friends over for a BBQ. She and another friend had set up the table inside the house. However, others wanted to eat outside. Even though my friend wanted to eat inside, she started to go along with the group until her friend mentioned that she was going to eat inside, as it was too cold outside for her. Her friend then mentioned that everyone else could eat where they would like to. That made my friend realize that just because she puts out what she wants, doesn’t mean that she’s stepping on something that someone else wants. We don’t have to give in or go along – we all have options as long as we communicate.

• Consistency – Being consistent with your boundaries is important too. If you insist on someone being respectful to you in one instance, but not in another, then you lose their respect in the end. Just as discipline for a child needs to be consistent, so too do boundaries. If there is confusion or ambiguity, then the discipline doesn’t stick. The same is true for boundaries. Another essential part of consistency is if we expect others to respect our boundaries, we need to respect theirs as well. As they say, it’s a two way street. A few months ago, we went to an Elton John/Billy Joel concert, which was great fun. Elton sang one of his old favorites, Someone Save My Life Tonight. I realized that someone has to Ask to be saved. Otherwise, we are not being respectful of the other person’s pacing, wants or needs.

• Facing reality – Part of establishing boundaries is facing the reality of your relationships. Boundaries often strengthen and enhance relationships. However, there are relationships that are not healthy and the true colors will be exposed one way or another. There comes a point where we need to be able to face the sacrifice or the potential downside of putting down limits. While in college, I was struggling to deal with family conflict. I went to a college counselor for some advice. I laid everything out that was going on in my family and wanted to be able to just let the conflict and pain roll off my back like water off a duck. He said something very helpful (though I didn’t realize it at the time), “It’s not easy to kick against the pricks and not say “Ouch!” In other words, I wanted to stay in an unhealthy situation and not feel the pain and anger. Sometimes, the best thing we can do is to respect our boundaries and understand when to make changes or let go.

• Conflict – Why is it so difficult to talk about boundaries? What are we really afraid of? In a word: Conflict. It is helpful to develop some level of comfort with conflict and disagreement. Some have a need to have others see things their way. Some find it very difficult to disagree with another for fear of hurt feelings or facing their anger. Yet, we all need to be able to find some way to handle conflict. To be able to say, Ok, we don’t agree on this, but this is my boundary… my limit. Let’s find a way to work with this.

• Respect – We need to respect differences and limits. Without respect, is there a relationship? … what foundation is there without respect? A friend once told me that to expect something of someone else in a relationship that they can’t fulfill is not fair to them. I can see that could be true for many expectations, but without respect, there is no relationship and one must move on or accept that as part of an unhealthy relationship.

Putting the puzzle together

We looked at communication, consistency, reality, conflict and respect in connection to boundaries. These are all aspects needed for a relationship, and boundaries keep them from puzzlegetting out of hand. We can also look at them as pieces to a puzzle. When you first start putting a puzzle together, the pieces are upside down, turned over and hidden. This can leave you feeling overwhelmed and not sure where to start. Everybody has different tactics. Some like to start with the frame and then work in small portions. Others start from the center or wherever they feel comfortable. There are many ways to go about solving issues. The key is recognizing the issue, setting guidelines that are realistic and achievable, and working together to bring resolution. Boundaries help us get back on track quicker, so we can appreciate each other, learn from the experience and enjoy life together.

What boundaries would you like to set up… starting today? Now it’s your turn to create a change in your life, if you are ready for it. Or to accept that you have situations that you are comfortable with using your current boundaries. Either way you have created your own destiny. We wish you the best in discovering your boundaries, and hope that you have the courage to change those that you wish to change.

Permission is needed from Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC to reproduce any portion provided in this article. © 2014 This information contained in this article is not meant to be a substitute for professional counseling.

Dana Borowka, MA, CEO, Ellen Borowka, MA, Senior Analyst and Nancy Croix, Senior Operations Administrator of Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC with their organization constantly remain focused on their mission statement – “To bring effective insight to your organization”. They do this through the use of in-depth work style assessments to raise the hiring bar so companies select the right people to reduce hiring and management errors. They also have a full service consulting division that provides domestic and international interpersonal coaching, executive onboarding, leadership training, global options for expanding your business, sales and customer service training, operational productivity improvement, 360s and employee surveys as well as a variety of workshops. They have over 25 years of business and human behavioral consulting experience. They are nationally renowned speakers and radio personalities on this topic. They are the authors of the books, “Cracking the Personality Code” and “Cracking the Business Code”. To order the books, please visit www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

If you would like additional information on this topic or others, please contact your Human Resources department or Lighthouse Consulting Services LLC, 3130 Wilshire Blvd., Suite 550, Santa Monica, CA 90403, (310) 453-6556, dana@lighthouseconsulting.com & our website: www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC provides a variety of services, including in-depth work style assessments for new hires & staff development, team building, interpersonal & communication training, career guidance & transition, conflict management, 360s, workshops, and executive & employee coaching. Other areas of expertise: Executive on boarding for success, leadership training for the 21st century, exploring global options for expanding your business, sales and customer service training and operational productivity improvement.

Better Communication Can Make for Better Business

Los Angeles Business Journal – Entrepreneur’s Notebook, Contributed By EC2, The Annenberg Incubator Project

[dropcaps type=”circle” color=”” background=””]H[/dropcaps]ave you ever had a miscommunication with your employees or co-workers that resulted in costly errors? This situation is not uncommon to most business people, but there are definite communication techniques that can save companies money and increase their bottom-line returns.

One example of ineffective communication involves a production manager for a furniture manufacturing firm, we’ll call him Joe, who oversees about 50 employees who work in teams men strugglingof five to 10 in manufacturing cells. His primary responsibilities are meeting production quotas and interacting with the customer-service and shipping departments.

The general manager became aware that these departments were encountering difficulties meeting quota and shipping schedules because of production problems in Joe’s department. The manager requested that we work with Joe to identify why these problems were taking place.

We found that Joe’s communication style was harsh and vague. His staff focused on his poor communication rather than the task at hand. They would take his instructions “as is” and work on the assignment with limited information instead of asking questions to clarify the process. The results were lower production, increased safety violations and poor workmanship.

Joe had a hard time acknowledging the communication problems that management was pointing out to him. In order to clarify the problem, we had Joe take the 16PF personality assessment inventory, which identifies not only areas for an individual to improve upon, but strengths and personality traits. We have found this assessment to be a valuable tool in assisting employees [to] gain insight about themselves. When Joe reviewed the profile results, he discovered the same problems that the management team had identified, and became more open to exploring ways to resolve them.

One of the first points we worked on with Joe was how to listen effectively to others. A primary cause for poor communication is poor listening skills, in which the listener fails to take in all the available information and instead relies on his or her own assumptions. Joe found that by using active listening, in which one paraphrases what he or she thinks the other person is saying, he was able to avoid this kind of miscommunication with his teams.

We encouraged Joe to avoid interrupting others and to ask more questions to ensure better understanding. Effective listening ensures that both the listener and the speaker end up on the same page.

Another cause for ineffective communication is poor speaking skills, so that the speaker provides vague and incomplete information to the listener. We suggested that Joe use “I” statements when speaking to his teams. By using “I” statements, Joe was able to take responsibility for his comments while clarifying his thoughts.

An example of an “I” statement is, “I feel under a great deal of pressure when you give the client a due date without checking with me first, because there may be some difficulties meeting that deadline.”

“I” statements are composed of three elements: The “I” helps the speaker maintain the responsibility for his or her feelings or observations; the “when” gives a specific example for the other person; and the “because” provides the reason why the speaker is bothered by the situation. “I” statements help the speaker to avoid being vague and accusatory with others.

Other people can interpret poor communication as a lack of respect and empathy. Joe discovered that he was unintentionally showing disrespect to his staff through his harsh communication. He needed to have more respect for his staff’s feelings and their points of view, even when he didn’t agree with them.

hands holding peopleThe key to having successful communication is to have empathy—to try to understand why someone is doing what he or she is doing and feeling, what he or she is feeling. Effective communication takes a great deal of patience. We suggested that Joe meet with his staff to discuss any problems and find some solutions. After they had a full discussion, he started a brainstorming session to facilitate better teamwork, not only in his own department, but also [about] how to work with other departments more effectively.

One idea was to have the customer-service department take a tour of the plant to better understand the manufacturing process. This created a sense of common purpose, a shared goal that all the people in his department desired and could agree upon, which encouraged teamwork rather than alienation. Joe then sat down with the customer-service staff to look at the problems that were occurring between his department and theirs.

The general manager and employees were very pleased by the positive results from Joe’s communication training. Customers are receiving their orders on time, accidents have decreased, workmanship has improved, production returns have decreased, and incentive bonuses were awarded to the plant.

Proficient communication is not by any means the easiest thing to do. It takes practice, patience and respect, yet the benefits can be immense.

Entrepreneur’s Notebook is a regular column contributed by EC2, The Annenberg Incubator Project, a center for multimedia and electronic communications at the University of Southern California.

Permission is needed from Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC to reproduce any portion provided in this article. © 2014

Dana Borowka, MA, CEO of Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC and his organization constantly remain focused on their mission statement – “To bring effective insight to your organization”.  They do this through the use of in-depth work style assessments to raise the hiring bar so companies select the right people to reduce hiring and management errors.  They also have a full service consulting division that provides domestic and international interpersonal coaching, executive onboarding, leadership training, global options for expanding your business, sales and customer service training, operational productivity improvement, 360s and employee surveys as well as a variety of workshops.  Dana has over 25 years of business consulting experience and is a nationally renowned speaker, radio and TV personality on many topics.    He provides workshops on hiring, managing for the future, and techniques to improve interpersonal communications that have a proven ROI.  He is the co-author of the books, “Cracking the Personality Code” and “Cracking the Business Code”. To order the books, please visit www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

If you would like additional information on this topic or others, please contact your Human Resources department or Lighthouse Consulting Services LLC, 3130 Wilshire Blvd., Suite 550, Santa Monica, CA 90403, (310) 453-6556, dana@lighthouseconsulting.com & our website: www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC provides a variety of services, including in-depth work style assessments for new hires & staff development, team building, interpersonal & communication training, career guidance & transition, conflict management, 360s, workshops, and executive & employee coaching. Other areas of expertise: Executive on boarding for success, leadership training for the 21st century, exploring global options for expanding your business, sales and customer service training and operational productivity improvement.

Are You Prepared To Lead The Way – Part 2

Excerpt from Cracking The Personality Code book

[dropcaps type=”circle” color=”” background=””]O[/dropcaps]ur friends and colleagues, Suzanne and Dwight Frindt shared the following ideas in our book, Cracking The Personality Code. The Frindts are the founders of 2130 Partners, a leadership development and education firm that facilitates focused vision, inspired teams, and sustained commitment for its clients.

Understanding the Role of Your Body

Studies have shown that to learn a new physical skill takes 300 repetitions for muscle-memory to be developed and 3,000 repetitions for the skill to be “embodied.” In a similar way, the Frindts believe that for intellectual learning to take root, it must be practiced repeatedly. In addition, there are key physical components that impact intellectual learning, bus man on bombespecially when someone is faced with stress.

Without awareness of these physical components, it’s almost impossible to learn to address distress differently. The Frindts are finding that the physical aspects of being in an emotionally distressed state are as important as the feelings themselves. These two elements are inextricably linked. Ignoring or overlooking the physical manifestations of emotion limits our ability to manage emotional distress.

Research into brain physiology is now giving us valuable understanding of the physiological dimension of our emotional reactions. This fundamental information is extremely useful for business leaders. For example, let’s look at a physical process sometimes referred to as “limbic hijacking.”

The limbic system is the part of the brain associated with emotion and memory. Within the limbic system are the amygdalae, two almond-shaped clusters of neurons whose primary responsibilities include scanning for danger and warning us of impending threats. A limbic hijacking occurs when the amygdalae are triggered, producing physical sensations of distress. Some common signals of the amygdalae’s work include sweaty palms, tense shoulders, dry mouth, and “butterflies in the stomach.” As the intensity of distress rises, the strength of the physical signals increases—and our rational, cognitive powers diminish.

A Biological Early Warning System

In their role as instinctual guardians, the amygdalae are part of our biological early warning system. They help ensure our physical survival by triggering four simple reactions: fight, flight, freeze, or appease. They respond instinctively, with lightning speed—much faster than the thinking portions of our brain.

For our early ancestors, who were dealing with a natural world that presented many real, life-threatening dangers, this function was essential to survival. But in today’s corporate workplace, amygdalae reactions can often hinder instead of help.

Here’s why. The amygdalae react instinctively, nearly instantaneously. Unfortunately, they can’t differentiate between a real or imagined threat. They also can’t distinguish between a physical threat and one generated by words or our own thoughts. And when the amygdalae send their warnings, they set powerful forces in motion throughout the body. Adrenaline and cortisol are released, raising heart rate and blood pressure. Blood drains from “less important” areas (such as our thinking brain) and goes to those areas needed for physical defense. We become a reactionary machine: on guard, on edge.

“Not the best state for thoughtful discourse, creative problem-solving or associative collaboration,” notes Dwight Frindt.

Post-Stress Mess

That’s just the beginning. There are also the after-effects. If we were running from a bear in the woods like our ancestors, that extreme physical effort would consume much of the excess adrenaline and cortisol released by the amygdalae’s warnings of danger. Because of that, soon after the danger had passed, our heart rate and blood pressure would drop, man and parachuteand we would return to a more relaxed, thoughtful state.

In the office, this doesn’t happen. On a typical working day the amygdalae may perceive many “threatening” situations. And even though these “dangers” take the form of spoken words or private thoughts rather than outside physical threats to our survival, they still trigger the same biological reactions. We get hyped up in self-defense mode with nowhere to run off the floods of adrenaline and cortisol.

Without a release, our heart rate and blood pressure stay high, other physical sensations continue, and we experience protracted stress. At a minimum, we’re frustrated, distracted, and unproductive; we’re certainly unable to be our most creative. In high-stress environments where perceived threats occur even more frequently, people may end up missing work altogether due to physical illness or needing a “mental health day.” Under these conditions, the risk of burnout is high.

The amygdalae and limbic system, along with the brain stem, form what is commonly called the “old brain.” In fact, the brain stem is sometimes referred to as the “reptilian brain” because it can be found in all vertebrates, including reptiles and mammals. It has to do with our most basic functions: breathing, sleeping, blood circulation, muscle contraction, reproduction and self-preservation. Coupled with the limbic system’s early warning system of danger, the reptilian brain provides a powerful image and an important clue in how behavior manifests during distress.

“Picture the angry team leader raging in a team meeting,” says Dwight Frindt. “It doesn’t take a great leap from there to imagine everyone around the table instantly transformed into iguanas, geckos, and gila monsters, each caught in their own reaction and defensive/offensive posturing. It is hard to imagine that many executives actually intend to have their companies managed by a group of reptiles. Yet this kind of behavior is regularly triggered and allowed to persist.”

Given the primitive, instinctual physical reactions associated with being upset, it’s no wonder that all those advanced conceptual-learning approaches are not very helpful in reducing the effects of emotional distress. The information we learn in those training workshops are accessed and processed in the cerebral cortex, the “new,” rational part of the brain. But as we’ve seen, when we get upset we begin functioning from an entirely different place, a different part of the brain.

So how do we bridge the gap between the thinking and feeling brain? How do we make use of both our higher reasoning and our emotional passion that fires so much of our inspiration and creativity? How do we do so in a way that minimizes reactivity and distress while increasing productivity and shared pride of ownership?

Leaders can use the answers to get more of their own thoughtful time back and enhance their ability to focus on critical business issues. Team members can use the answers to raise their individual and collective productivity in ways that enhance their lives rather than increasing their stress. In both cases, people are able to move from an experience of trying to survive to one of thriving.

The Frindts propose that leaders start by working on themselves. The truth is organizations look to their executives to set the tone. If those executives are highly reactive, in all likelihood their organizations will be, too. On the other hand, if leaders learn to identify and clear their own emotional distress first, they’ll be more productive, they’ll trigger less stress within their teams, and they’ll be much better equipped to support team members in navigating their own emotional reactions.

Dwight and Suzanne Frindt have seen it time and again. As leaders begin to experience the benefits of their increased ability to “de-stress” emotionally, it becomes an obvious investment to train others. Just as mounting stress can create its own snowball effect in a team, team members can begin to build a new kind momentum of converting distress to eustress (healthy, productive stress—as in the excitement of pursuing a challenging goal). The more individuals there are who can identify and clear their own emotional distress, the easier it becomes for other colleagues to join them in maintaining a balance of thoughtful productivity and emotional engagement. It’s a process that, when fully committed to, can transform a culture.

While lasting change takes time and continuous practice, there are a few simple, critically important steps that can begin to immediately repair the damage of emotional distress. These diagnostic and intervention steps are both conceptual and physical. They give your intellect the information and your body the tools to change both experience and behavior.

5-Step Recipe for Identifying and Clearing Distress

  1. Learn to observe and identify body sensations that signal a “limbic hijacking” is taking place. It sounds obvious, but many people have no awareness of their physical state when they’re upset. Yet this information is critical to implementing lasting change. So practice. With a bit of self-observation, most of us can say (for example), “I feel pressure in my chest,” “I feel blood rushing to my neck,” “I stiffen up,” “I get this feeling in the pit of my stomach.” It’s essential to develop the skill of recognizing your physical buildingsymptoms. It’s so important, in fact, that this physical in-formation comes before anything else in the intervention process. Practice this step until you have a clear understanding of your reactions.
  2. Exhale and slow down your breathing. After you’ve learned to identify that you’re in a “hijacked” state, you can incorporate the practice of altering your breathing. The quickest and most effective method to immediately calm the “fight or flight” response is to take long, slow, deep breaths. When stressed, it’s common to hold your breath or to take very shallow breaths as part of your defensive response. Exhaling fully and slowing down your breathing is simple. It’s also quite possibly the most important and powerful antidote to emotional distress.
  3. Identify your amygdalae-triggered reaction. Learn to observe your automatic defense. Are you doing fight (assertiveness/attack), flight (mentally checking out or even physically leaving the room), freeze (deer-in-the-headlights, unable to think of what to do next), or appease (“sucking up,” e.g., “Oh, yes, I know exactly what you mean,” or “I’m with you on that.”)? Depending on the circumstances, you’re likely to have one reaction that triggers as your default defensive position. As you realize what your reaction is, you’ll also start to see its limits and its impact on others. This awareness actually builds the capacity to choose different behavior that gets you more of what you intend.
  4. Stop trying to drive your agenda. When under emotional distress, you’re more likely to make statements that you’ll later wish you could eat (and may have to). One of the most productive steps you can take in a moment of upset is to stop talking, breathe, and observe. Allow your-self some time. Is there really a reason to rush? If you can learn to step back and observe your own distress, or simply stay calm in the face of another’s distress, there’s an opportunity for a positive outcome.
  5. Ask yourself a “brain-switching” question. The amygdalae can only respond to a perceived threat, such as “Is that a bear, and is it going to eat me?” Unfortunately, since they cannot tell the difference between a physical threat and a threat in language, they go off frequently in the office or home where there hasn’t been a bear sighting in years. You can reactivate your thinking capacities by coming up with a reminder question. Use this question consistently (almost like a mantra) to activate the cerebral cortex of the brain. For example, ask yourself something that brings you back to a big-picture perspective: “What is the purpose of this meeting?” “What are we committed to here?” The relative sophistication of such a question will refocus your thinking and energy and will allow your system to relax.

One Last Thought

Next comes practice, practice, and more practice. You (and everyone else) have had decades of practice with your specific defensive reactions to distress. These reactions can be triggered by so many kinds of comments, tones of voice, and even facial expressions that you’ll have to work hard to refine your “brain switching.” In the beginning, it may not be possible to catch yourself before you’re already in the throes of a defensive, stressful conversation. However, with practice it’s possible to read the symptoms of defensiveness in your body and to mitigate the oncoming emotional reactions. If you commit yourself, it will become a lifelong discipline, and it will be well worth it.

Permission is needed from Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC to reproduce any portion provided in this article. © 2014 This information contained in this article is not meant to be a substitute for professional counseling.

Suzanne Frindt is a co-founder and principal of 2130 Partners, an executive leadership development and education firm that launched in 1990. She is also a recognized speaker on the topics of Vision-Focused Leadership™ and Productive Interactions™, speaking to organizations around the world. She is also a Group Chair for Vistage International, Inc. an organization of CEOs and key executives dedicated to increasing the effectiveness and enhancing the lives of more than 12,000 members. Each month she facilitates groups in Orange County, California, and Seattle, Washington, while also regularly contributing entrepreneurial creativity and management experience to several companies through service on their advisory boards.

Dwight Frindt is also a co-founder and principal of 2130 Partners. Since 1994, Dwight has been a Group Chair for Vistage International facilitating groups of CEOs and senior executives. He has received many performance awards for his work at Vistage and in 2009 Dwight became a Best Practice Chair and began mentoring the Chairs in the South Orange County area. Since then he has added two additional Best Practice Chair regions; the Puget Sound and the Greater Pacific Northwest. In 2011 Dwight received the Best Practice Chair of the Year Award – Western Division. Combining his work with 2130 Partners and Vistage, Dwight has facilitated more than 1,000 days of workshops and meetings, and has logged well over 13,000 hours of executive leadership coaching.

In addition to working in the for-profit world, Dwight and Suzanne are very committed to working with non-profits and have been investors and activists with The Hunger Project for many years. To reach them please visit www.2130partners.com.

If you would like additional information on this topic or others, please contact your Human Resources department or Lighthouse Consulting Services LLC, 3130 Wilshire Blvd., Suite 550, Santa Monica, CA 90403, (310) 453-6556, dana@lighthouseconsulting.com & our website: www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC provides a variety of services, including in-depth work style assessments for new hires & staff development, team building, interpersonal & communication training, career guidance & transition, conflict management, 360s, workshops, and executive & employee coaching. Other areas of expertise: Executive on boarding for success, leadership training for the 21st century, exploring global options for expanding your business, sales and customer service training and operational productivity improvement.

To order our books, “Cracking the Personality Code” and “Cracking the Business Code” please go to www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

Are You Prepared To Lead The Way – Part 1

Excerpt from Cracking The Personality Code book

How to Become a Vision-Focused Leader

[dropcaps type=”circle” color=”” background=””]T[/dropcaps]he answer is leadership. It is time to become a vision-focused leader around whom issues can be raised and resolved productively. That’s the view of Suzanne and Dwight Frindt, the founders of 2130 Partners, a leadership development and education firm that facilitates focused vision, inspired teams, and sustained commitment for its clients.bizmen with telescopes world

Ask yourself these questions:

• Are your conversations with your team generating the results you want?
• Does your team successfully raise and resolve issues relevant to business success?
• Can you identify and deal with emotional upsets, in both yourself and others?

Exactly what is this leadership that is vision-focused? “We love Warren Bennis’ definition: ‘Leadership is the wise use of power. Power is the capacity to translate intention into reality and sustain it,’” says Suzanne Frindt. “Our approach is the same whether we are working with individuals or with en-tire leadership teams. We believe the greatest opportunities are created by the development of people and action in a coordinated direction. We assert that the only sustainable strategies engage the heart and soul and are simultaneously grounded in sound business practices.”

Suzanne Frindt co-founded 2130 Partners with her husband Dwight in 1990. She is a recognized speaker on the topics of Vision-Focused Leadership™ and Productive Interactions™(www.2130partners.com), speaking to various organizations around the world. Suzanne is also a group chair for Vistage International, Inc., an organization dedicated to increasing the effectiveness and enhancing the lives of more than 14,000 CEO and executive members in sixteen countries.

Dwight Frindt established 2130 Partners on an idea that has become the cornerstone of the firm. The guiding methodology of Vision-Focused Leadership was born from his years of hands-on executive experience and from his thirty-year affiliation with The Hunger Project, an organization committed to the sustainable end of world hunger. Dwight has integrated his knowledge of managing operations, acquisitions, and turn-arounds with insights he has learned through the work of The Hunger Project in rural villages around the world. Dwight also serves as a group chair for Vistage International and monthly facilitates CEO and executive groups in Orange County, California.

In their leadership programs, through their firm 2130 Partners, the Frindts train participants to utilize a new paradigm and methodology to shift the way they listen and dialogue. This critical approach enhances fundamental skills and abilities to have successful interactions—the corner-stone of effective leadership.

Power of Shared Vision

In a 1996 article in the Harvard Business Review entitled “Building Your Company’s Vision,” Jim Collins and Jerry Porras said that companies that enjoy enduring success have a bizpeople seeing sunrisecore purpose and core values that remain fixed while their strategies and practices endlessly adapt to a changing world. The rare ability to balance continuity and change—requiring a consciously practiced discipline—is closely linked to the ability to develop a vision.

Vision provides guidance about what to preserve and what to change. Suzanne Frindt calls vision a “Yonder Star.”

“Without a vision, what is the point?” says Suzanne Frindt. “A Yonder Star unleashes the energy to galvanize yourself and your employees so you can achieve phenomenal things.”

When group members share a vision, it creates an opportunity for totally different conversations between a manager and members of their team. Focus on the shared vision creates alignment and provides a powerful context for creating mission, strategic initiatives, objectives, goals, roles, and finally all the way down through action plans.

Being a manager means making choices. At any moment in time you have a decision to make. Suzanne urges that when it comes time to make a decision being present in the moment, not on automatic pilot, is essential to the quality and relevance of the decision. You can then make the choice based on your Yonder Star, your shared vision of something to which you aspire, versus more of the same or your fear of some worst-case scenario.

“Worries are about envisioning a worst-case scenario, what you fear most,” says Suzanne Frindt. “Whatever we envision is affecting us right now. What we envision impacts us in this moment. There are consequences for managing based on fears that you may not want. Your Yonder Star is the shared vision you aspire to. The star is what you envision, and what you envision shapes both the present moment and the quality of your choices about your actions.”

Something else she recommends avoiding is being past-focused. This is when you make decisions based solely on what you have done in the past. Instead of having an inspiring vision for your team, all you are working for with a past based focus is attempting to minimize perceived risk and making incremental improvements.

“Many companies are past-focused when they do strategic planning,” says Suzanne Frindt. “What did the company do last year and then let’s add 10 percent or 20 percent. We are all tempted to try hard to make yesterday look like today. Or if we didn’t like yesterday, then we try to make it different or better.”

She adds that only by having a vision, a Yonder Star, can teams create breakthroughs to unprecedented results. Equally important is that it is a shared vision, one that is based on shared values and shared operating principles. This is how you create an environment for real collaboration.

The Frindts also advise their clients to learn to shift from being monologuers to dialoguers. As Margaret Miller once said, “Most conversations are simply monologues delivered in the presence of witnesses.” A monologuer manager is driven by proving they are right rather than engaging in a conversation for creative problem solving. This monologuing manager often gets surrender and appeasement from their team members rather than enthusiastic engagement.

Dialogue is the opposite. The three Cs of dialoguing are connect, con-verse and create. It has been said that the purpose of dialogue is not to share information but to create information. The focus is on the issue and your shared purpose rather than each other. As a manager, your ability to model and encourage listening that is curious and open dramatically increases your effectiveness. The dimensions that become possible are creativity, connection, alignment, focus, and collaboration.

“You create your vision, honestly assess where you are, and then get to work on the gap,” says Suzanne Frindt. “On the road there will be road-blocks and potholes. As a manager you work with your team to get around the roadblocks and fill in potholes.”

Overcoming Emotional Barriers

“The ability to identify and clear upsets, in myself and others, is the single most significant key to productivity gains in our economy today,” says Dwight Frindt. “We have asked our executive-leadership clients a simple question: ‘What time could you go home if everyone in the company simply came to work, did their jobs, and went home?’ The answer used to men with ladders and wallsurprise us until it kept being repeated. On average, our clients say, ‘Between 10:30 a.m. and 11:00 a.m.’”

That begs a second question. If so many executives claim they could go home before lunch if everyone just showed up and did their work, what’s taking so much of our leaders’ time? The Frindts’ clients tell them flat out: distress, commonly known as upsets. The most time-consuming part of their job is managing the distressed interactions within their teams so that those teams can actually get to the business at hand.

“Okay, let’s assume there’s gross exaggeration at play here, fueled by frustration and wry humor,” continues Dwight Frindt. “But even if executives will never be able to consistently leave by noon, it is entirely reason-able for them to expect to save at least two hours of their time, every day. Alternatively they could increase their productivity 15–30%”

That’s nearly 500 extra hours a year leaders can devote to creative thinking, visioning, and strategizing rather than on repairing relationships and soothing bruised egos. At the opportunity cost of most executives’ time, that amounts to very substantial savings. Of course, the same can be said for everyone in the organization. An inordinate amount of productive time and payroll dollars and worse yet, opportunities, are lost daily, monthly and annually to the distraction caused by unresolved emotional distress.

Replacing that time, energy, and resource loss is of paramount importance. Doing so can create a culture that is both highly productive and emotionally resilient and rewarding. It requires a fundamental, transformative shift in two steps: 1) fewer emotionally driven issues in the workplace; and 2) leaders and their team members becoming self-sufficient in handling emotional distress issues when they occur.

“Let’s clarify what we mean by emotional distress,” says Dwight Frindt. “We’re using the term to summarize a wide range of reactions that temporarily disable people with regard to thoughtful and productive behavior. These reactions can vary from mild frustration to full-blown anger, and include embarrassment, sadness, impatience, agitation, worry, and fear. In each case the person is left in a condition where, whether realized or not, they are acting as if their very survival is threatened.”

The Causes of Emotional Distress

The Frindts’ studies and their clients’ experiences make it clear that the most common root causes of workplace emotional distress are 1) the perception that a promise has been broken (usually by leadership); 2) when positive intentions “fail”; and 3) when commitments seem thwarted. In addition to these three internal triggers, there are many times when busman and sharkpersonal distress is brought to the workplace from the rest of the person’s life. These other sources can be especially difficult to address, due to varying perspectives on what constitutes personal-professional boundaries.

The impact on the productivity and organizational effectiveness of people attempting to work while “stressed out” (or surrounded by others who are) is enormous. Yet it’s been the Frindts’ observation that most leaders overlook this as the place to start any efforts in business improvement. Most are far more comfortable with cost cutting, process development, process improvement, reorganizing, or some other business change that does not directly address the human dimension.

To help disarm this apparent reluctance to actively engage when emotional distress is present, the Frindts began several years ago to bring their clients a variety of expert presentations, books, and other training opportunities for building communication and issue-resolution skills. Even though there are many excellent resources available in this field, they were disappointed in the results. Their clients’ progress after exposure to all this material fell significantly short of what had been anticipated. The clients’ ability and skill in powerfully addressing emotional, distressing situations didn’t dramatically change.

So what went wrong? Why didn’t all that training and exposure to skill-building help when emotional distress was triggered? The problem is not in the content of the material. It’s in the limitation of its focus. Most of this highly regarded material addresses and is received by the intellectual part of the mind. That’s fine, as far as it goes, but too often the audience comes away with a conceptual understanding while gaining little or no real skill at changing behavior. Providing access to new information and a broader intellectual understanding is a good start, but it’s only a start. The Frindts found that unless this information is somehow deeply absorbed and embodied beyond the intellect, it vanishes when people are challenged and faced with intense emotion—their own or that of others.

In part two of this article, we will provide further ideas as well as the “5-Step Recipe” for identifying and dealing with emotional distress that can prevent vision-focused leadership.

Permission is needed from Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC to reproduce any portion provided in this article. © 2014 This information contained in this article is not meant to be a substitute for professional counseling.

Suzanne Frindt is a co-founder and principal of 2130 Partners, an executive leadership development and education firm that launched in 1990. She is also a recognized speaker on the topics of Vision-Focused Leadership™ and Productive Interactions™, speaking to organizations around the world. She is also a Group Chair for Vistage International, Inc. an organization of CEOs and key executives dedicated to increasing the effectiveness and enhancing the lives of more than 12,000 members. Each month she facilitates groups in Orange County, California, and Seattle, Washington, while also regularly contributing entrepreneurial creativity and management experience to several companies through service on their advisory boards.

Dwight Frindt is also a co-founder and principal of 2130 Partners. Since 1994, Dwight has been a Group Chair for Vistage International facilitating groups of CEOs and senior executives. He has received many performance awards for his work at Vistage and in 2009 Dwight became a Best Practice Chair and began mentoring the Chairs in the South Orange County area. Since then he has added two additional Best Practice Chair regions; the Puget Sound and the Greater Pacific Northwest. In 2011 Dwight received the Best Practice Chair of the Year Award – Western Division. Combining his work with 2130 Partners and Vistage, Dwight has facilitated more than 1,000 days of workshops and meetings, and has logged well over 13,000 hours of executive leadership coaching.

In addition to working in the for-profit world, Dwight and Suzanne are very committed to working with non-profits and have been investors and activists with The Hunger Project for many years. To reach them please visit www.2130partners.com.

If you would like additional information on this topic or others, please contact your Human Resources department or Lighthouse Consulting Services LLC, 3130 Wilshire Blvd., Suite 550, Santa Monica, CA 90403, (310) 453-6556, dana@lighthouseconsulting.com & our website: www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC provides a variety of services, including in-depth work style assessments for new hires & staff development, team building, interpersonal & communication training, career guidance & transition, conflict management, 360s, workshops, and executive & employee coaching. Other areas of expertise: Executive on boarding for success, leadership training for the 21st century, exploring global options for expanding your business, sales and customer service training and operational productivity improvement.

To order our books, “Cracking the Personality Code” and “Cracking the Business Code” please go to www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

Have Any Problem Children In Your Company?

By Allison Pratt

[dropcaps type=”circle” color=”” background=””]M[/dropcaps]ost employees who are “problem children” are not problems because they can’t do the job or don’t have the technical skills. Most problem people are lacking the softer interpersonal and communication skills. Take for example, Eddie. Eddie manages a staff of about twelve project engineers for a high-fighting bizmentech company. These engineers are senior technical people who are highly-educated, bright and hardworking; and they all have one other thing in common – they dislike working for Eddie. While Eddie is respected on a technical level by all who work with him, his rudeness, insensitivity and lack of interpersonal skills are often discussed openly by his coworkers and staff. “If we could only put him in a room by himself and let him design…” is a common sentiment among his co-workers. Unfortunately, no one has told Eddie about his offending behavior directly…

Greg is a construction supervisor who had outstanding capabilities as a hands-on crew member. He could build or repair any construction problem; plumbing, drywall, carpentry, electrical and more! So, as a direct result of his superior hands-on skills, he was promoted to become the supervisor of a large work crew. Unfortunately, he is not thriving in his new role. Not only is he not a capable supervisor, Eddie doesn’t enjoy the new responsibilities and his staff does not respect or want him as their crew leader. How can he “save face” and stay with the company? Eddie knows he’s failing, but his boss has never brought the issue up with him….

Or let’s look at Susan. Susan is a teller in a busy bank. She works with 4 other tellers, but is so caustic in her dealings with co-workers they avoid her. She never smiles, greets her coworkers with a “Good Morning” or “Good Evening”, is cutting and sarcastic when she does speak with them, and doesn’t have a kind word to say to anyone but her customers. If only she could treat her coworkers with the same respect. Although she is an effective teller, her lack of interaction with the rest of the workgroup is beginning to affect her performance. She is often out of the loop with important issues because no one wants to speak with her if they can avoid it. This will likely escalate, and Susan doesn’t even know about the real problem….

Why We Are Not Effective Dealing with Our Problem Children

  1. We sweep it under the rug: During these performance concerns, we’ve all thought “It’ll get better on its own”, “Maybe they’ll just leave the company on their own”, “That’s just Susie …” Not only is this not true in most cases, the behavior often escalates when we avoid or look the other way.
  2. Avoiding confrontation is a natural tendency: Most people want to avoid, not create a confrontational situation. Managers erroneously believe avoiding confrontation is essential running bizmanto maintaining goodwill and positive relationships.
  3. We tend to soften the blow or sugar coat to avoid hurting feelings: By not clearly and directly communicating the feedback, the real message often doesn’t come across when we finally do speak with the person. The problem child still doesn’t know what behavior you want them to work on and change.
  4. The manager of the problem employee may not be adequately prepared: Managers are not born with the necessary management skills. Many managers could benefit from training in coaching and providing feedback to their employees. Their discomfort and lack of skills could be the cause of avoidance.

Why do we want to provide feedback and deal with our problem employees? It’s challenging and sometimes uncomfortable to do, so what exactly can you expect to gain by tackling these tough issues?

Benefits of Dealing Effectively with Our Problem Children

  1. Most employees would rather know, than not be aware, of their offensive or inappropriate behavior.
  2. If you don’t tackle the situation directly now, it festers. Not only will it not go away, it will grow. As emotions rise the problem can become exaggerated, making it much more difficult to deal with than it was early on.
  3. Top performers appreciate corrections and the opportunity to grow. By providing performance feedback there is an opportunity to grow, learn and become an even better employee. People appreciate true, constructive feedback.

We know it’s a good idea to address problem children. We know the individuals and the company often both benefit from improved relationships and productivity. So how do we get there?

Tips for Dealing Effectively with our Problem Children

  1. Deal with the behavior, not the person. We cannot change who people are, but how they act on the job. Define clearly; what is the specific behavior that needs to be changed? For example, “Bill you are just being lazy” is not effective feedback. Instead say: “Bill, you’ve been late to work 3 times in the past 2 weeks. What’s going on?”
  2. Train managers and supervisors to identify and address performance problems and create a course of action. Managers should be comfortable with their ability to give feedback, provide coaching and training, and, if necessary, to implement disciplinary action up to and including termination.
  3. Make sure you approach the situation in an objective, fair manner. All corrections and feedback should be done with respect for the individuals involved.
  4. Be sure the real cause of the performance issue is identified. Managers tend to blame the employee for their lack of motivation or skill; or believe training is the solution for all problems. When employees are asked what contributes to their lack of performance, they often blame external factors such as unrealistic goals or unclear direction. This gap can be closed and deficiencies in employee performance can be successfully and skillfully addressed. Doing so can improve the productivity and morale of your organization.
  5. Use of an in-depth work style and personality assessment can be helpful for both staff and new hires. An assessment can identify potential personal interaction issues for a new hire before they join an organization. This tool can also be helpful in providing constructive, objective feedback as well as offer ideas on handling a personal interaction growing bizmancommunication issue with current staff. In addition, if the individual is having problems accepting feedback from their supervisor regarding a specific behavioral trait, an assessment can assist in identifying the issue and help the supervisor in dealing with the issue in a constructive manner. For more information on interpersonal communication coaching, please click here.

A goal of all effective business communication is to maintain goodwill and relationships. This includes more than just customer relationships; but relationships among all employees, managers and coworkers. By addressing the behavior of your problem children, in a respectful, direct and constructive manner, you can improve the strength of your entire organization which in turn will increase employee effectiveness and growth to the bottom line! If you do decide to have the discussion with your problem employee, documenting the discussion is always recommended. For a free form to help you document, please mail Allison Pratt at allisonjpratt@gmail.com.

Allison Pratt owns Pratt & Associates, a Human Resources consulting Company and has been a Human Resources professional with over thirty years of experience in all aspects of human resources management. Her experience is varied and includes corporate, consulting and academic perspectives and has provided a wide-range of clients with strong human resources support. Allison also teaches at the graduate and undergraduate levels for six local colleges and universities. Her specialties: HR Generalist services including areas such as mediation and conflict resolution, pre- and post-termination advice, harassment investigations and training, creating employee handbooks, performance management and supervisory coaching and training. For more information, please contact Allison Pratt at 949-588-8385 and allisonjpratt@gmail.com.

Permission is needed from Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC to reproduce any portion provided in this article. © 2014

If you would like additional information on this topic or others, please contact your Human Resources department or Lighthouse Consulting Services LLC, 3130 Wilshire Blvd., Suite 550, Santa Monica, CA 90403, (310) 453-6556, dana@lighthouseconsulting.com & our website: www.lighthouseconsulting.com

Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC provides a variety of services, including in-depth work style assessments for new hires & staff development, team building, interpersonal & communication training, career guidance & transition, conflict management, 360s, workshops, and executive & employee coaching. Other areas of expertise: Executive on boarding for success, leadership training for the 21st century, exploring global options for expanding your business, sales and customer service training and operational productivity improvement.

To order the books, “Cracking the Personality Code” and “Cracking the Business Code” please go to www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

Growth Takes Resources, How Fast Do You Want to Grow?

By Jim Canfield

[dropcaps type=”circle” color=”” background=””]T[/dropcaps]here is ultimately only one reason to grow your business; to increase its value. Business leaders like you everyday are entering into, swimming amongst or exiting out of some stage of their company’s growth. You don’t have to be a Wall Street resident or even an expert to recognize the daily stock man growing moneyprice fluctuations speculating what will be become the next stage for an enterprise. Do they predict booming growth based on the current track record or are they raising red flags indicating someone or something is potentially locking that growth potential down? Whether the stakeholders in your business are private or public, unlocking any door to a stage of growth is an overwhelming and gargantuan task. However, nothing can create value faster than actual or visualized organizational growth.

I have had the good fortune of watching hundreds of companies and their growth patterns as they attempted to unlock the potential growth envisioned by the CEO and supporting management team. While each organization possessed similar desires to achieve their projected results, the actual outcomes I witnessed varied widely. Some started out well enough, full of enthusiasm and confidence only to lose focus and momentum eventually forcing them to a plateau. Others, while starting slow, built steam but failed to push hard enough to create the required breakthrough. What caused these best intentions to disintegrate into disappointing outcomes?

One thing was apparent, each organization subscribed to the same two notions:

  1. The CEO and his/her supporting team “wanted to take the company to next level”, yet they were unaware of what their current level was and therefore couldn’t identify the next one they wanted to achieve.
  2. This same leadership team also declared that “our business is different” and for that reason the hurdles they must conquer to get to the “next” level cannot parallel any other organizations.

What are these levels to which they alluded and was each company truly all that different?

The various levels that the management teams alluded to can be summarized into what I term as The Four Stages of Growth: Start-Up, Initial Growth, Early Growth and Mature 4 stagesGrowth.

After spending thousands of hours with CEOs and their executive teams, you would think that these theoretical differences between one organization and the next each attempting to advance would be crystal clear. This was not the case. Instead five issues creating hurdles to the next growth stage emerged over and over again; People, Processes, Profitability, Personal Leadership and Planning.

This concept is the basis of the GrowthSpeed formula for company growth. At each level of growth, the five hurdles appear in a slightly different form. The company must successfully negotiate and leap over each of these five hurdles to move on to the next level of growth. The inability to make a transition over one of these hurdles forces the envisioned growth to stall at the current level. The company must then repeat the attempt at that hurdle until it is conquered.growthspeed formula

Imagine the thoroughbreds that compete in hunter-jumper competitions. They are confronted with a series of hurdles or gates as they negotiate the course. Each hurdle presents a different type of challenge; some are tall, others wide, several hurdles in sequence, while others require a landing in water. When a hurdle is not completed it may be due to a horse and rider which fail to attempt a hurdle and when part of it is hit, it is not counted as complete. The horse and rider are penalized and in some cases they must attempt the hurdle again.

As I mentioned, these hurdles show up in different forms at each growth stage. The Start-Up level is characterized by the desire to launch a new idea or concept into a viable commercial venture. This can be the emergence of a new company, the distinction of a new operating division and/or the development of a new product or service offering. The focus is on survival. The predominant activity is proving the concept by generating sales revenue. Finding a customer becomes paramount. This phase is often characterized by the founding team exclaiming, “we got the business, now what do we do?”

During the Start-Up stage, the People Hurdle is focused on creating assistance for the founder. The Process Hurdle is focused on identification and documentation of effective processes to provide clarity for new team members that join the organization in the future. The Profitability Hurdle in this stage is focused on staying afloat as the new venture attempts to sustain itself. This often requires outside funding, capital infusion or income sources from the owner. The Personal Leadership Hurdle places the founding leaders each in the role of the Champion. The leaders must be the Champion for the business, the concept and the value customers will receive. The Planning Hurdle represents the need for a business plan that can effectively articulate the value proposition and the opportunities associated with the new venture. This document will be the looking glass through which prospective investors, partners, customers and employees will determine whether they see themselves as part of this company’s future.

Each one of these hurdles represents a critical juncture for the organization. If they are not successfully negotiated and conquered, the company must repeat the attempt until the hurdle is crossed or risk their possible demise.

As a company navigates their way through the stages, each of the five hurdles is clearly present, but manifested in different ways. As you enter the next stage, not only do you need to recognize their new appearance, your arsenal to conquer them will also likely change. Think of the garden enthusiast who desires to make an empty patch of land into a vibrant and bizperson plantingbountiful vegetable garden. First they must plant the seeds and during their start-up growth, snails appear. By using the latest and greatest repellent, the gardener kills the snails. As the seeds continue their growth and the garden begins to flourish, crabgrass appears. It doesn’t look like a snail, it doesn’t act like a snail same but it is a hurdle nonetheless. The gardener can’t use the snail repellent this time; crabgrass is its own animal and requires a different solution. You get the point.

Regardless of the size of your business, or the type of business you are in – your desire to advance through the four stages is most likely present. And therefore, so is the inevitable emergence of the five hurdles. Take a look around, what growth level are you at right now? How are the hurdles expressed in your organization? Most importantly, what level do you want to be at and how can the GrowthSpeed formula get you over those hurdles?

A client company launching a new line of business faced these hurdles recently. While successfully negotiating several hurdles, two presented obstacles. The founder/CEO was still in the role of Champion and hadn’t transitioned to Leader. He found it difficult to recruit, retain and develop new salespeople because “no one knew the business like he did.” The organization also lacked clarity in the identification and reliable application of its processes. What symptoms did the organization possess to reach this diagnosis?

First, It was obvious the company was growing, yet employees felt they were working harder and accomplishing less. There was significant time wasted on re-doing tasks and explaining unsatisfactory work which was blamed on inadequate processes. Second, virtually all new business development was still being accomplished by the founder/CEO. This put the organization at risk of being totally dependent on one person for growth.

As a result of this diagnosis, new strategic plans were developed including key objectives for developing new revenue growth by recruiting and developing additional sales professionals. An operational plan was documented to improve effectiveness of existing processes while redesigning others. The key to these changes and the subsequent growth acceleration was person holding cloud over treethe application of the GrowthSpeed formula to identify the obstacles to growth and then implement the plans to address them.

Every organization I have worked with has been confronted by these hurdles as they navigated their own desired course of growth. Their ability to identify and subsequently conquer the hurdles is what truly differentiated them from each other after all. If you would like to identify your current stage of growth and what might be holding you back, contact Jim Canfield at 858-449-4207 or JimC@ExecutiveForums.com.

Jim Canfield is the CEO of Renaissance Executive Forums, a world leading membership organization for company CEOs and business owners. He enjoys the opportunity to provide programs, mentorship and inspired connections that develop CEOs and management teams, to drive bottom line business results and enhance overall quality of life. His focus throughout all that he does centers on supporting and inspiring business leaders who are committed to growth and achievement. He has worked with inspiring clients that include small-to-medium size organizations and incredible thought-leaders such as Tony Hsieh from Zappos.com, Chip Conley, author of “Peak,” and founder of JDV Hotels and more. His years of coaching and working closely with CEOs and their teams has been extremely rewarding and has over 5,000 hours of coaching and worked with more than 300 CEOs. His approach brings a unique blend of extensive experience in leadership theory coupled with practical real-world experience building several companies. Providing clarity and insight into the unique leadership roles and responsibilities of CEOs, business owners, senior executives and managers, he is able to make moving to the next level a reality. Jim can be reached at 858-449-4207 or JimC@ExecutiveForums.com. Contributing Author for this article: Kristy Cornell.

Permission is needed from Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC to reproduce any portion provided in this article. © 2014

If you would like additional information on this topic or others, please contact your Human Resources department or Lighthouse Consulting Services LLC, 3130 Wilshire Blvd., Suite 550, Santa Monica, CA 90403, (310) 453-6556, dana@lighthouseconsulting.com & our website: www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC provides a variety of services, including in-depth work style assessments for new hires & staff development, team building, interpersonal & communication training, career guidance & transition, conflict management, 360s, workshops, and executive & employee coaching. Other areas of expertise: Executive on boarding for success, leadership training for the 21st century, exploring global options for expanding your business, sales and customer service training and operational productivity improvement.

To order the books, “Cracking the Personality Code” and “Cracking the Business Code” please go to www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

It’s Time To Take A Fresh Look At How Things Are Being Done!

By Dana Borowka, MA

[dropcaps type=”circle” color=”” background=””]M[/dropcaps]ost organizations are taking a very careful look at how things are being done in their companies – from processes to staff. The ideas shared in this article provide proactive ideas to consider and implement before making any changes. If you choose to create more efficiencies, cut out a program, upgrade or add staff make sure you know the why’s before implementing any plan. Without clarity, the odds are that you will be creating more issues than solutions. It is crucial that all staff members, ranging from the receptionist to mailroom to management positions, are contributors to help create better productivity and profitability. Ideas are the crown jewels and we need to create an environment that will allow your people to share openly.

The first step is to ask for help and input from everyone. Most people want to help but many times no one asks them. This is the time to rally your staff and begin to collaborate and Listeninggather ideas in the following areas:

•  Improving efficiency
•  Marketing and sales
•  Opportunities for acquisitions
•  Operational processes
•  Cost efficient ways to do things differently
•  Identify specific traits in people that you’d like to add to your team
•  How to better mentor staff members

Those are just a few areas to explore. Looking out into the future, you’ll want to take advantage of some of the fresh talent that will be available. However, you will need to be very selective as to who you’ll want on your team. Managing down doesn’t work any longer. Understanding the strengths of an individual will help to promote a positive environment where people will want to share ideas that might not have been considered in the past. This is the time to build a positive reputation so your company is a magnet for attracting top talent.

What’s The Cost For Not Having Fresh Ideas?

I was at a restaurant recently and asked to see if an item that I didn’t see on the menu was available or if I had overlooked it on the menu. The restaurant didn’t have the item, but the staff response set me back. The server stated, “Our goal is to think out of the box. To do what we can to please the customer so that positive word of mouth is shared and that will result in more business for us!” Isn’t that what we all want… team members that will think out of the box… positive word of mouth about our business… to increase revenue. What we all need are people like that on our team. So the million dollar question is… how do we get staff members to think along those lines and how can we attract people like that?

What is Driving Your Top People – Selection of Top Performers & Managing for Profitability

Learn what is driving your top talent people. If you help them to succeed you’ll create a high level of retention and become a magnet for recruiting. Here are some action items for you to consider:

  1. Use an in-depth work style and personality assessment during the hiring process and for current staff.rocket lady
  2. Use the data to manage, which in turn will reduce the learning curve for new hires and help to better understand current staff members.
  3. Place individuals in positions that they can succeed in based on their strengths.
  4. Take the time to constantly mentor and create plans to help individuals grow.
  5. Identify traits of individuals that you want in your organization and target those individuals through specific messages in ads, on the web, through networking and association gatherings.

For your A players (your major contributors), play to their strengths and help them grow. Don’t ignore them just because they are doing well. These are the individuals that if they don’t feel engaged in helping the organization to continue to grow and improve, they’ll leave.

For your B players, nurture them through mentoring so they can become A players down the road. For your C players, measure and possibly remove them if they are eating up your time. Never spend 80 percent of your time and energy on the people who are producing 20 percent of your results.

Are Your Managers Managing for Success? – Check out this Story!

But don’t write those C players off too fast. A small hotel chain had reservation reps that were not meeting the volume level that was being required. The manager thought they were just C players and was a very unhappy camper with his team. That person was placed in a different department and a new manager came in who sat down with each individual and then with the group. She discovered that 24 hours before a guest was going to arrive at the hotel property that a high percentage were calling in to verify the reservation and to get directions. This used up valuable call time, so as a team they brainstormed together and came up with a brilliant idea. Since the reps were asking for email addresses why not send an email confirmation 24-48 hours prior with a fun page welcoming the individuals and include links for weather and directions.

Guess what happened? Calls were reduced and the reps were able to take more calls for new reservations with less hold time. All because the manager took the time to ask questions to peel the onion back to identify the underlying issue. When the reps were asked why this topic hadn’t been addressed in the past they simply responded, “No one asked and we never thought of it”.

Set Your Sights on the Future

Make the most out of this business time frame by helping others in your team to be successful, build a positive reputation, ask your team for ideas and contribute to the well being of the entire organization, train staff to mentor others and be on the look out for adding fresh talent to your team! Remember, it is important to be precise in what you are looking for and MC900297401[1]do a thorough job interview by asking probing questions, doing reference and background checks and utilizing an in-depth work style and personality assessment.

This is the time to set your sights on the future, deal with the present by supporting your team and ask for input. Set your organization on a course for long term success by using proactive and collaborative mentoring, management and vision. We’d love to hear about your successes.

Permission is needed from Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC to reproduce any portion provided in this article. © 2014

Dana Borowka, MA, CEO of Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC and his organization constantly remain focused on their mission statement – “To bring effective insight to your organization”. They do this through the use of in-depth work style assessments to raise the hiring bar so companies select the right people to reduce hiring and management errors. They also have a full service consulting division that provides domestic and international interpersonal coaching, executive onboarding, leadership training, global options for expanding your business, sales and customer service training, operational productivity improvement, 360s and employee surveys as well as a variety of workshops. Dana has over 25 years of business consulting experience and is a nationally renowned speaker, radio and TV personality on many topics. He provides workshops on hiring, managing for the future, and techniques to improve interpersonal communications that have a proven ROI. He is the co-author of the books, “Cracking the Personality Code” & “Cracking the Business Code”. To order the books, please visit www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

If you would like additional information on this topic or others, please contact your Human Resources department or Lighthouse Consulting Services LLC, 3130 Wilshire Blvd., Suite 550, Santa Monica, CA 90403, (310) 453-6556, dana@lighthouseconsulting.com & our website: www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC provides a variety of services, including in-depth work style assessments for new hires & staff development, team building, interpersonal & communication training, career guidance & transition, conflict management, 360s, workshops, and executive & employee coaching. Other areas of expertise: Executive on boarding for success, leadership training for the 21st century, exploring global options for expanding your business, sales and customer service training and operational productivity improvement.

Ten Surefire Ways to Improve Your Sales Calls to Meet Monthly and Quarterly Goals

By Rob Hupp

[dropcaps type=”circle” color=”” background=””]I[/dropcaps]n pursuing and successfully closing business with prospective clients or customers, it is often necessary to conduct one or bizman and phonemore sales calls. Depending on the nature of your business (and location of your prospect), these calls can be conducted in person or by phone. The experience and information shared in this article are applicable to either type of sales call. (These sales calls precede presentations or proposals which we will cover in a future article.)

The purpose of the sales call is for both seller and buyer to determine whether or not there is sufficient overlap between the buyer’s needs and seller’s capabilities to merit considering doing business together. If this critical overlap is present, there are a number of questions, issues and challenges that both parties need to discuss and work out to achieve a mutually-beneficial business arrangement. The ten tips in this article are for sellers endeavoring to conduct more effective sales calls with their prospective buyers. (That said, prospective buyers, these tips are also relevant to you and your purchases.)

1) Follow a communications/discovery process and share the process with your prospect

Enlighten your prospect as to how you suggest going about determining whether or not it makes sense to work together. Outline the steps in the process and solicit their input and concurrence. “Typically when I first meet with the owner of a firm like yours, it makes sense to discuss Item A, Item B, and Item C. Are there any additional items for today’s meeting and do you agree with this list?”

As adults, surprises do not generally lead to positive outcomes. When both parties know what is going to happen next, it reduces anxiety and increases ability to focus resulting in enhanced communication.

2) Know what you want to accomplish in each meeting

Specifically what do you need to determine and communicate in your next meeting with a prospect? Just keeping the dialogue going is probably not a sufficiently specific goal for the upcoming call. You may need to determine delivery timeframes, budgetary constraints, and approval process.

There are usually two facets of communication and discovery that are going on here: first, substantive discussion of needs and potential solutions and second, based on this interaction, do we believe we can work together effectively? Most sales calls focus on the substance of the discussion and often minimize the significance of assessing ability to work together. If after several meetings you have misgivings about your ability to work together, it probably makes sense to address this concern in one of several ways.

3) Set an Up-front Contract for each meeting with the prospect

An Up-front Contract is more than a meeting agenda, but an agenda is a good start. In addition, it is worthwhile to explicitly identify beforehand the purpose of the meeting, how much time is set aside, attendees and acceptable outcomes of the meeting. The Up-front Contract is reviewed with the prospect and agreed to in advance of the meeting. It helps to eliminate those pesky surprises such as walking into a boardroom full of people when you expected to meet only with your prospect and the firm’s marketing director.

4) Prepare your list of questions and discussion paths beforehandwoman with list

It is advantageous to formulate your list of key questions and discussion items prior to the meeting. By being prepared, you are less likely to forget raising a very key item. More importantly, you are better able to focus your energy, intellect and attention on really listening to and absorbing what the prospect is saying. If you are less worried about what you are going to say or ask next, your listening and bonding and rapport are heightened.

5) Dial in to the prospect’s communication style and cues

As we are reminded, communication is more than merely words exchanged. Tonality and non-verbal cues such as body language can convey critical feedback. If you sense your buyer is being increasingly uncomfortable, take the heat yourself and offer up “I may be reading the situation incorrectly, but I am sensing you are uncomfortable with this discussion. Do I have this right, and what can we do to alleviate your discomfort?”

6) Follow the 70/30 rule

The rule is simple to state and more challenging to implement consistently: listen 70% of the time and talk 30% of the time. Use your 30% ‘talk time’ to ask the questions you prepared as well as to pose additional clarifying questions based on the prospect’s responses.

Sales calls are not the place to inundate the prospect with features, benefits, history of your company, etc. Sales calls are for you and your prospect to discover his problems/issues, constraints, etc. and agree on an approach to solve. By asking great questions, really listening, and seeking further clarification, you are facilitating more effective discovery and agreement. (Your prospect will not feel like he is being ‘sold.’)

7) Resist the urge to dispense free advice

As a professional in your field, you possess a wealth of knowledge and experience you are anxious to share with the world. STOP! At this preliminary stage of discussion, you may not yet know enough to accurately diagnose the prospect’s problem(s). You may be doing your prospective client and yourself a disservice. If you do solve the problem now or the prospect thinks you have offered up a solution, chances are you’re done and out.

Complete your discovery discussion with the prospect prior to proposing a solution, even if this means holding multiple sales call meetings. If the prospect pushes you for information prior to completing discovery, indicate you will summarize key findings at the end of each sales call.

8) Validate your assumptions and question what does not make sense

bizman with questionPattern recognition that comes with experience is a powerful tool in solving problems and offering solutions. That said, validate your key assumptions with this prospect. For example, if your prospect is going to have to undergo an extensive financial review to get approval for financing, determine your approach and timing for discussing this with him. Don’t assume everyone already understands such requirements and associated processes.

If in the course of discussion, you hear statements or assertions from the prospect that do not make sense based on your experience or industry practice, respectfully ask for clarification. Don’t provoke an argument but be brave and seek to achieve clarity.

9) Recap and summarize the results of the sales call with the prospect

At the end of the sales call meeting, compare notes with the prospect. Did you both hear the same things and reach the same conclusions? Are there specific issues or differences of opinion or perspective that need to be further analyzed and discussed? What will probably happen next in the discovery process? Can we set an Up-Front Contract for our next meeting or agree to a process and timeframe to set the next Up-front Contract?

10) Debrief the sales call just completed

Congratulations. Together we have made it to Number Ten. After each sales call, sit down with a colleague, an accountability partner, or just yourself and objectively debrief the call. How did you perform on the previous Nine Tip Areas summarized in this article? From the list of nine, identify 2 areas where you performed well and 2 areas for improvement. Be specific as possible. Additionally, review and handle follow-up items from the sales call meeting with your prospect.

Regardless of your business or profession, conducting effective sales calls is a critical skill to acquiring, developing and retaining customers. Don’t leave these important interactions toman growing money chance. Follow these steps and watch the impact on your business.

Final Thoughts

According to Dana Borowka, CEO of Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC (www.lighthouseconsulting.com), hiring the right people is key to future growth. If you would like additional information on hiring, please click here to see an article on this subject.

Permission is needed from Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC to reproduce any portion provided in this article. © 2014

Rob Hupp is co-founder of Roth|Hupp Growth Partners, Inc., a business development and training firm specializing in helping organizations and individuals increase their revenues through more effective sales and management practices. Rob can be reached at 310.890.3704 or via e-mail at rhupp@rhgp.com.

If you would like additional information on this topic or others, please contact your Human Resources department or Lighthouse Consulting Services LLC, 3130 Wilshire Blvd., Suite 550, Santa Monica, CA 90403, (310) 453-6556, dana@lighthouseconsulting.com & our website: www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC provides a variety of services, including in-depth work style assessments for new hires & staff development, team building, interpersonal & communication training, career guidance & transition, conflict management, 360s, workshops, and executive & employee coaching. Other areas of expertise: Executive on boarding for success, leadership training for the 21st century, exploring global options for expanding your business, sales and customer service training and operational productivity improvement.

To order the books, “Cracking the Personality Code” and “Cracking the Business Code” please go to www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

Are You Prepared to Lead the Way – or Has Fear Got Your Focus?

By Dana & Ellen Borowka

Recently, we have had a number of conversations with CEOs and key executives regarding what they are planning for their businesses for the new year. We have found two categories of individuals. Those that have a vision through listening to others in the market place, reaching out for support, gathering industry data, looking for trends and opportunities. The other group is totally focused on overhead reduction, darting around and focusing on the bad news in the world, taxes, health man buried in paperbills, and any information that they can grab onto to help justify why they are so scared.

Here is the Question for the Day

Which category do you fit into? Your answer will determine how your company is doing today and will be doing in the future. Those that think they know everything are closing themselves off from amazing opportunities.

Certainly all companies need to be constantly looking at overhead and keeping up with the news. However, when the focus is fear driven then our thoughts begin to justify our fears. That wastes time as it creates the continual loop of fear, depression, anxiety, etc.

The group that is forward thinking has a completely different outlook on life. That’s not to say that they don’t have concerns but rather they are using this time to plan ahead, remain clear headed and open to ideas. That is the key – to be still enough in order to listen. Then act on what we are seeing as immediate and future potential for new products and services, improvement in retention of current business as well as ideas for gaining additional market share.

Your focus will tell you immediately where you stand! First, we will explore leadership and how to deal with the fear. Then we’ll share what a group of business owners did that has separated them from many other companies.

How to Become a Vision-Focused Leader

The answer is leadership. It is time to become a vision-focused leader around whom issues can be raised and resolved productively. That’s the view of Suzanne and Dwight Frindt, the founders of 2130 Partners, a leadership development and education firm that facilitates focused vision, inspired teams, and sustained commitment for its clients and co-authors of Accelerate: High Leverage Leadership for Today’s World

Ask yourself these questions:

• Are your conversations with your team generating the results you want?
• Does your team successfully raise and resolve issues relevant to business success?
• Can you identify and deal with emotional upsets, in both yourself and others?

Exactly what is this leadership that is vision-focused? “We love Warren Bennis’ definition: ‘Leadership is the wise use of power. Power is the capacity to translate intention into reality and sustain it,’” says Suzanne Frindt. “Our approach is the same whether we are working with individuals or with entire leadership teams. We believe the greatest opportunities are created by the development of people and action in a coordinated direction. We assert that the only sustainable strategies engage the heart and soul and are simultaneously grounded in sound business practices.”

Power of Shared Vision

In a 1996 article in the Harvard Business Review entitled “Building Your Company’s Vision,” Jim Collins and Jerry Porras said that companies that enjoy enduring success have a core purpose and core values that remain fixed while their strategies and practices endlessly adapt to a changing world. The rare ability to balance continuity and change—requiring a MC900297401[1]consciously practiced discipline—is closely linked to the ability to develop a vision.

“Without a vision, what is the point?” says Suzanne Frindt. “A Yonder Star unleashes the energy to galvanize yourself and your employees so you can achieve phenomenal things.”

When group members share a vision, it creates an opportunity for totally different conversations between a manager and members of their team. Focus on the shared vision creates alignment and provides a powerful context for creating mission, strategic initiatives, objectives, goals, roles, and finally all the way down through action plans.

Being a manager means making choices. At any moment in time you have a decision to make. Suzanne urges that when it comes time to make a decision being present in the moment, not on automatic pilot, is essential to the quality and relevance of the decision. You can then make the choice based on your Yonder Star, your shared vision of something to which you aspire, versus more of the same or your fear of some worst-case scenario.

“Worries are about envisioning a worst-case scenario, what you fear most,” says Suzanne Frindt. “Whatever we envision is affecting us right now. What we envision impacts us in this moment. There are consequences for managing based on fears that you may not want. Your Yonder Star is the shared vision you aspire to. The star is what you envision, and what you envision shapes both the present moment and the quality of your choices about your actions.”

Something else she recommends avoiding is being past-focused. This is when you make decisions based solely on what you have done in the past. Instead of having an inspiring vision for your team, all you are working for with a past based focus is attempting to minimize perceived risk and making incremental improvements.

“Many companies are past-focused when they do strategic planning,” says Suzanne Frindt. “What did the company do last year and then let’s add 10 percent or 20 percent. We are all tempted to try hard to make yesterday look like today. Or if we didn’t like yesterday, then we try to make it different or better.”

She adds that only by having a vision, a Yonder Star, can teams create breakthroughs to unprecedented results. Equally important is that it is a shared vision, one that is based on shared values and shared operating principles. This is how you create an environment for real collaboration.

Overcoming Emotional Barriers

“The ability to identify and clear upsets, in myself and others, is the single most significant key to productivity gains in our economy today,” says Dwight Frindt. “We have asked our executive-leadership clients a simple question: ‘What time could you go home if everyone in the company simply came to work, did their jobs, and went home?’ The answer used tomen with ladders and wall surprise us until it kept being repeated. On average, our clients say, ‘Between 10:30 a.m. and 11:00 a.m.’”

That begs a second question. If so many executives claim they could go home before lunch if everyone just showed up and did their work, what’s taking so much of our leaders’ time? The Frindts’ clients tell them flat out: distress, commonly known as upsets. The most time-consuming part of their job is managing the distressed interactions within their teams so that those teams can actually get to the business at hand.

“Even if executives will never be able to consistently leave by noon, it is entirely reasonable for them to expect to save at least two hours of their time, every day. Alternatively they could increase their productivity 15–30%” says Dwight Frindt.

That’s nearly 500 extra hours a year leaders can devote to creative thinking, visioning, and strategizing rather than on repairing relationships and soothing bruised egos. At the opportunity cost of most executives’ time, that amounts to very substantial savings. Of course, the same can be said for everyone in the organization. An inordinate amount of productive time and payroll dollars and worse yet, opportunities, are lost daily, monthly and annually to the distraction caused by unresolved emotional distress.

Replacing that time, energy, and resource loss is of paramount importance. Doing so can create a culture that is both highly productive and emotionally resilient and rewarding. It requires a fundamental, transformative shift in two steps: 1) fewer emotionally driven issues in the workplace; and 2) leaders and their team members becoming self-sufficient in handling emotional distress issues when they occur.

“Let’s clarify what we mean by emotional distress,” says Dwight Frindt. “We’re using the term to summarize a wide range of reactions that temporarily disable people with regard to thoughtful and productive behavior. These reactions can vary from mild frustration to full-blown anger, and include embarrassment, sadness, impatience, agitation, worry, and fear. In each case the person is left in a condition where, whether realized or not, they are acting as if their very survival is threatened.”

The Causes of Emotional Distress

The Frindts’ studies and their clients’ experiences make it clear that the most common root causes of workplace emotional distress are 1) the perception that a promise has been broken (usually by leadership); 2) when positive intentions “fail”; and 3) when commitments seem thwarted. In addition to these three internal triggers, there are many times when personal distress is brought to the workplace from the rest of the person’s life. These other sources can be especially difficult to address, due to varying perspectives on what constitutes personal-professional boundaries.

The impact on the productivity and organizational effectiveness of people attempting to work while “stressed out” (or surrounded by others who are) is enormous. Yet it’s been the Frindts’ observation that most leaders overlook this as the place to start any efforts in business improvement. Most are far more comfortable with cost cutting, process development, process improvement, reorganizing, or some other business change that does not directly address the human dimension.

Long Term Vision & Working the Plan

Back in 2006/2007, a group of business owners saw the writing on the wall regarding the long term economic change. While some people thumbed their noses at the possibility and buried their heads in the sand… purely out of fear. The forward looking group sought feedback from others who had been through similar business cycles and discovered the following ideas:

  1. Create your vision: The goal is to have a long range vision for your company.man on ladder peeling sky
  2. Think outside your box: What else can you provide? What other opportunities can you look at? What are some other possibilities that will help others to fulfill their vision?
  3. What is needed: Listen to the market place and offer valuable services.
  4. Know your numbers: Where are you and where are you going?
  5. Work the plan: Develop measurable marketing, sales, financial, internal operations plans then execute and don’t wait. This avoids waste and preserves valuable resources. Through proper planning the dollars can be used to gain market share while other organizations could be financially drained and in a constant state of fear! The forward business group took a three year outlook and developed various action plans and worked the plan.
  6. Be on the lookout for top “A” and “B” players for hiring top people who have vision.
  7. Team vision: Have clear goals and objectives for all staff members.
  8. For new hires at all levels do the most thorough interviewing based on 30-60-90-180-12 month goals.
  9. Do in-depth work style and personality assessment testing to get a clear picture of who you are about to bring aboard to best manage the individuals so they can be successful.
  10. Maintain a collaborative team environment where everyone can provide input to create internal efficiencies, all are listening to customer and market needs, and respond in a timely way so your company is always engaged as the business environment has needs.

This is the time to be moving forward by offering fresh ideas, solutions, and support that will add value to all those you come in contact with and in return your business will thrive!

Permission is needed from Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC to reproduce any portion provided in this article. © 2014 This information contained in this article is not meant to be a substitute for professional counseling.

Suzanne Frindt is a co-founder and principal of 2130 Partners, an executive leadership development and education firm that launched in 1990. She is also a recognized speaker on the topics of Vision-Focused Leadership™ and Productive Interactions™, speaking to organizations around the world. She is also a Group Chair for Vistage International, Inc. an organization of CEOs and key executives dedicated to increasing the effectiveness and enhancing the lives of more than 12,000 members. Each month she facilitates groups in Orange County, California, and Seattle, Washington, while also regularly contributing entrepreneurial creativity and management experience to several companies through service on their advisory boards.

Dwight Frindt is also a co-founder and principal of 2130 Partners. Since 1994, Dwight has been a Group Chair for Vistage International facilitating groups of CEOs and senior executives. He has received many performance awards for his work at Vistage and in 2009 Dwight became a Best Practice Chair and began mentoring the Chairs in the South Orange County area. Since then he has added two additional Best Practice Chair regions; the Puget Sound and the Greater Pacific Northwest. In 2011 Dwight received the Best Practice Chair of the Year Award – Western Division. Combining his work with 2130 Partners and Vistage, Dwight has facilitated more than 1,000 days of workshops and meetings, and has logged well over 13,000 hours of executive leadership coaching.

In addition to working in the for-profit world, Dwight and Suzanne are very committed to working with non-profits and have been investors and activists with The Hunger Project for many years. To reach them please visit www.2130partners.com.

If you would like additional information on this topic or others, please contact your Human Resources department or Lighthouse Consulting Services LLC, 3130 Wilshire Blvd., Suite 550, Santa Monica, CA 90403, (310) 453-6556, dana@lighthouseconsulting.com & our website: www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC provides a variety of services, including in-depth work style assessments for new hires & staff development, team building, interpersonal & communication training, career guidance & transition, conflict management, 360s, workshops, and executive & employee coaching. Other areas of expertise: Executive on boarding for success, leadership training for the 21st century, exploring global options for expanding your business, sales and customer service training and operational productivity improvement.

To order our books, “Cracking the Personality Code” and “Cracking the Business Code” please go to www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

Business Etiquette Around The World

By Alan Weiss – Excerpt from the book, Cracking the Business Code

The following are some suggestions and advice from American Language Services.

Picture from documentary McLuhan's Wake

Picture from documentary McLuhan’s Wake

Asia in General

The three predominant business cultures of Asia are Chinese, Japanese, and Indian, and they are so different that each has to be treated separately. However, there are a few common elements to almost all of Asian business:

• Asians value experience and respect age and hierarchy.

• Asians tend to be less individualistic than Americans and less anxious to stand out.

• Asian business practices are more formal. Dress conservatively, be on time, and use people’s formal titles.

• Giving offense or causing embarrassment for a negotiating partner is extremely damaging to any future business relationship.

• Saving face, and allowing your counterpart to save face, is extremely important, so it’s equally important to find euphemistic ways of saying “no,” such as, “We will consider your idea” or “I must study your proposal further.”

China

• The status of the westerners convening or attending a meeting is always noted by Chinese hosts, and they will resent having to deal with someone they consider of low rank in your organization.

• When setting up a meeting, be aware that it will be in Chinese and it is up to you to bring an interpreter. Many Chinese understand at least some English, but it will not be used in a meeting.

• Business cards are vital, and should be printed in English on one side and Chinese on the other. Be aware that the written and spoken form of Chinese is very different in Taiwan and Hong Kong than in the rest of China, and prepare accordingly. Treat an offered card with respect and examine each one before putting it away carefully.

• Hierarchy rules every business meeting and transaction. At the start of a meeting, the highest-ranking person enters the room first. Each delegation’s leader introduces his team, and then business cards are exchanged.

• If your company is the biggest, the oldest, or the best, don’t be shy about saying so; prestige and prosperity are openly respected in China. Presentation materials should never look “low rent.” Printed materials should be on quality paper. Bring more than enough copies for everyone.

• Be patient and be careful not to show anger or animosity.

Japan

• Japanese business is generally face-to-face, and people prefer to do business with someone they’ve met.

• Although most Japanese in business speak English, and meetings may sometimes be conducted in English, it would be wise to bring your own interpreter, not just to clarify points but also to keep the Japanese side aware that you’re capable of understanding their internal talk.

• Meetings tend to be communal, with each nationality’s “team” introduced at the start of a meeting. Do not address individuals, as a rule, but the whole room. The seating arrangement at meetings is up to the host and done strictly by rank. The bosses are seated first, and at the end of a meeting they are the first to get up. The most senior person on the Japanese side will often say very little, allowing his staff to handle the meeting while he observes it silently.

• Business cards should be in English on one side, Japanese on the other. Get the finest printing you can, and never give anyone a card that isn’t perfect. As everyone knows, the exchange of business cards is an important Japanese ritual. The card is equated with the person offering it; it should be accepted with both hands and carefully examined.

• Taking copious notes in a meeting is a sign of respect. Don’t use a red pen or pencil to write someone’s name, not even your own — it’s a sign of death.

• Gift giving is common and a western businessperson should have a hierarchy of gifts, from the most senior to the most junior Japanese counterpart.

India

• Like the rest of Asia, the boss is king, and corporate relationships are strictly governed by rank. Decisions are made at the top, so always seek to meet with the highest-world tree universeranking counterpart that you can.

• Words like sir, madam, Mr., and Mrs. are still used with everyone in India. Politeness is prized.

• Things take time in India, and schedules are frequently adjusted accordingly. Americans generally prefer to focus on one thing at a time; business practices in India are attuned to tending to many things at the same time. Schedules are padded because interruptions are common and expected.

• Always be polite in negotiation, even if you also have to be firm. Even staged tantrums are considered very bad form.

• Indians like small talk. It is considered rude to plunge right into business discussions, though that rule is increasingly going by the wayside in especially westernized industries like media.

• Business cards are not the fetish they are in China or Japan, but carry plenty of them. English only is fine.

Europe

• Although Europe is gradually becoming less formal, conservative business dress and elaborate politeness is still the rule. Always be careful to address people formally, as Mr., Mrs., or Ms., and be sure to use their academic rank and job title as well, especially in northern Europe.

• A handshake is quick and ceremonial, not a “grip and greet.” Expect to shake hands at the end of a meeting as well. Always extend a greeting to a meeting participant before asking a question of them.

• As a rule: Punctuality is a business must in Europe, but much of southern Europe has a slightly more relaxed attitude. Showing up early for a meeting would seem rude in Spain; but in the UK, Scandinavia and Germany, not showing up early would be rude.

• Small talk, personal questions, and banter are parts of a meeting in Mediterranean and southern countries. In the north, it’s more common for the highest ranking person at the meeting to start right into business.

• Bring business cards — English only is fine — but more and more Continental businesses are using e-cards and other unconventional media in place of paper cards, a statement of Euro style as well as ecology.

Russia

• Though most Russians in business speak English, bring an interpreter anyway. Gestures like having meeting documents translated in advance into Russian, and having one side of your business card printed in Russian are important and appreciated marks of respect. Cards aren’t handled with the near-awe they receive in China and Japan but they should still be treated with care.

• Shake hands firmly, maintaining eye contact. Shake hands at the beginning and end of every meeting. Initially Russians tend to be reserved. Don’t expect friendly smiles at first.

• Shows of emotion and anger, threats and walkouts are not uncommon business strategies, and negotiations can be more uninhibited, in fact heated, than elsewhere.

• It is considered bad form to use heavy sales pressure in Russian business meetings, which often take the academic-seeming form of opposing panels of experts who expect detailed, factual presentations.

• Business negotiation in Russia takes time and patience. Don’t expect quick results. No agreement is final until a contract is signed.

Latin America

• Connections and connectedness are extremely important in Latin American business. You will be judged by the person who introduces you, and that impression is hard to change later, so choose carefully. You may also be judged by how senior a person you are meeting.

World in Hand by Petrix5

World in Hand by Petrix5

• Punctuality is important but be patient if your host runs into unexpected scheduling delays. It is essential to confirm and reconfirm upcoming meetings, days in advance.

• Initial meetings will be formal and frequently slow paced by comparison to North America or Asia. Agendas may end up being stretched over several sessions. Travel flexibility can be important in completing a deal.

• Have written materials translated into English and Spanish (or, obviously, English and Portuguese in Brazil). This goes for business cards too. It is not unusual for business cards to list educational and professional accomplishments. Present your card with the Spanish side up.

• Hire your own interpreter, even if the local host company provides one, for much the same reason that you would bring your own lawyer to a signing.

• Personal acquaintanceship is essential in Latin American business; personal trust is essential to success. Expect to make repeated, unhurried meetings both formal and informal. Pushing for a quick deal is still considered rude.

Permission is needed from Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC to reproduce any portion provided in this article. © 2016

Alan Weiss is the Vice President of Sales for American Language Services (ALS-Global). For over a quarter of a century ALS-Global has provided translation, interpretation, transcription and media services (dubbing, voiceovers & subtitling) services. Alan has over 25 years of experience in international sales and client relations. He is well versed in working with international clientele and has a deep understanding of international business etiquette and how it differs from culture to culture in different parts of the world. Alan is a graduate from Western Michigan University in Kalamazoo, Michigan and has earned a Bachelor’s degree in International Business with a minor in Business Communications. Alan can be reached at 310-829-0741, ext. 304 and alan@alsglobal.net.

If you would like additional information on this topic or others, please contact your Human Resources department or Lighthouse Consulting Services LLC, 3130 Wilshire Blvd., Suite 550, Santa Monica, CA 90403, (310) 453-6556, dana@lighthouseconsulting.com and our website: www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

Lighthouse Consulting Services, LLC provides a variety of services, including in-depth work style assessments for new hires & staff development, team building, interpersonal & communication training, career guidance & transition, conflict management, 360s, workshops, and executive & employee coaching. Other areas of expertise: Executive on boarding for success, leadership training for the 21st century, exploring global options for expanding your business, sales and customer service training and operational productivity improvement.  To order the books, Cracking the Personality Code and Cracking the Business Code, please go to www.lighthouseconsulting.com.

We recently launched a new service called Sino-Am Leadership to help executives excel when stationed outside their home country. American managers in Asia and Asian managers in America face considerable business, personal, and leadership challenges because of the cultural differences. This unique program provides personal, one-on-one coaching. For more information visit, https://lighthouseconsulting.com/performance-management/talent-development/sino-american-management-style/.